Early morning reflection as the sun rises or tries to rise through the fog. It is fall.
A glorious time in the Bay Area. I am fully awake in bed.
2020 took on a life of its own. As I prepare to fully enter 2021, I thought it prudent to take stock of my emotional state to see what was up. I had an ah-ha moment or maybe it is a reminder.
I have a deep but not wide emotional well.
The nature of how I work is relational. Highly.
I have no doubt that this is partly a survival strategy. I have always been one of a few- if not the only. Thus, it has been important to “know the other person” so I can respectfully, effectively and authentically cultivate, nurture and navigate the relationship as part of the work. They are not separate for me.
This means I often seek and invite intimacy.
2020 brought with it high highs and low lows. One way this affected me is that I accessed and made visible parts of myself often hidden. The fact that I did it (and seem to be still doing it) surprises me. I have no expectations for how long it will last or where it will take me. I am comfortable not knowing.
2021 will likely continue with high highs and low lows. And all the in-betweens.
Self care has risen in priority. To be in this work and this world, fully and completely requires rest, release, resistance, peace, silence, health and love.
Also, knowing my emotional well is deep and not wide, I must pay more attention to both the quantity and quality of my relationships - personal and professional (the line between the two is permeated). There is a cost to being in deep relationship and to be honest not everyone is worth it. And it is not without heartbreak and tears.
So I write this as a reminder to myself foremost and perhaps an invitation to others.
Hozzászólások